Most pastors I know have had some variation of the following conversation more than once—many times more than once:
“Pastor, my relationship with Jesus isn’t what I want it to be.”
“How do you want it to be?”
“I want to be closer to him.”
“Tell me about your prayer life.”
“Well, I don’t really have one.”
“How about time with Scripture?”
“No, I don’t really do that, either.”
“Maybe you just spend some time in silence, meditating.”
“No, not so much. Silence to do most anything is tough to find.”
“So, no real prayer life, no real time spent with the Bible, and silence in general is tough to find. Why is that?”
“Well, I’m busy. A lot of demands, so it’s hard to find the time to do one more thing. It’d mean getting rid of something I’m already doing. And even if I did, I don’t really feel I know how to pray or where to start when it comes to reading the Bible.”
It’s a conversation I could’ve had with my pastor once-upon-a-time because it pretty accurately reflects my own see-saw experience of getting serious about Jesus prior to becoming a pastor myself.
I knew, like most Jesus-followers, that I was called to a deeper relationship with the Lord than what I had. The challenge was that I couldn’t see a way to pursue such a relationship in the midst of an already demanding, over-committed life. I would try but, always, deeper eluded me.
I started looking for The Answer. There had to be a way to get to where the deeper wouldn’t elude me. What I really wanted, of course, was a step-by-step program to tell me precisely what I needed to do to carve a time and a place out of my daily life for Jesus and stick with it. A program, in short, that would put time with Jesus at the top of the list where it would stay day in, day out. I read books, I read articles, I read websites, but in the end I came to realize The Answer I sought was as simple as this: if you really want to carve a time and place out of your life for Jesus and stick with it, just do it.
In our overly demanding, overly crowded schedules we find time to exercise, read newsfeeds and social media, listen to podcasts, etc. etc. The point being that we find a way to make time for what we really want to make time for. We prioritize.
The conversation I’ve had above always boiled down to this: as important as people claim a deeper relationship with Jesus is to them, they don’t desire it strongly enough to make it a priority. The excuses for why they don’t set aside and protect time for Scripture, silence, and prayer are the same excuses they could use for why they don’t exercise, read their newsfeeds and social media, or listen to podcasts. Except they do exercise, read their newsfeeds and social media, and listen to podcasts.
But pastor, they’d say, it’s not that simple.
Yes it is.
I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. I even preached on it this week.
And here’s the deal: we were created to abide in Jesus (Jesus himself said so in John 15:4). There is nothing more important to our personhood and, ultimately, the world than you and I and all God’s children abiding in Jesus. But we can’t if abiding in Jesus isn‘t at least as big a daily priority as exercise, newsfeeds, social media, and podcasts. And making it a daily priority begins when we make the commitment to making it a daily priority—and continue committing to making it a daily priority daily.
Some colleagues in ministry try to shame, frighten, or otherwise coerce people into making a time and place in their lives to be with Jesus.
No thank you.
I’ve been on the receiving end of such an approach more than once and I, for one, immediately shut down. The Holy Spirit doesn’t try to shame, frighten, or coerce people; it’s unclear to me why so many Jesus-followers believe such a strategy will work if they do. Most often the Holy Spirit waits and, from time to time, gently nudges.
So consider this a gentle nudge: We are all human beings. Jesus created all of us to abide in him. However good or however bad you feel life is, it’ll be better with daily doses of Jesus. So open your bible, read, and pray. Don’t worry that you won’t say the right words the right way. Trust me when I say Jesus is far more interested in the fact you’re trying than in whether or not your prayers are eloquent and insightful. Jesus doesn’t need eloquent and insightful from you. He already knows everything you’re stumbling to say anyway. Jesus simply wants you—there, in the silence, your heart and mind open, because you have made time with him at least as big a priority as time with your smartphone.
That’s not a platitude. It’s a spiritual discipline in service to spiritual Truth.
David - I have found over many years or corporate & self employment that the weekly men’s bible study is an excellent way to push myself to a relationship with Jesus! It sets a schedule & then you grow.